Why Embracing A Personal Quest Might Be Just What You Need To Overcome Complacency And Create Permanent Change
ADVANCE CONFIDENTLY!
“To begin is the most important part of any quest and by far the most courageous.” ~Plato
What would have us wrestling with the words of Plato? Why is it considered courageous to begin something new? Why do we become so comfortable in the familiar day to day mundane activities of our lives?
What is it that keeps us stuck and complacent when knowing full well we are capable of far more than we are currently producing or accomplishing?
Why do we settle for less? Why do we allow ourselves to accept less than what we know we deserve? Why do we lull ourselves into believing our lives are good enough when we know a better life lies just beyond where we’ve allowed ourselves to take shelter? How does apathy creep into our lives?
Questions?
Is it possible the solution to all the challenges and problems we face resides in our ability to ask better questions? Why do we embrace the superficial rather than taking on the deeper more challenging questions of life?
Is it fear?
What if it were as simple as not being willing to let go of whatever excuse we have made for not being where we would rather be?
Our rudimentary brain was designed to do just one thing. It was designed to protect us, to keep us safe from threats. The problem though, is all the saber tooth tigers are gone and we have moved out of the caves where we once lived. Unfortunately, our brains are still playing catch up…
Our brain will go to great lengths to protect us from all kinds of horrible things like embarrassment for example. Imagine being so concerned about what others might think of us for pursuing our dreams and goals we instead simply pretend that life is good enough just as it is, and if we’re not careful, the tiger might reemerge…
If we aren’t willing to risk failure, then we are resigned to live a life of safety and security and I’m not here to suggest there’s anything wrong with that unless you have somehow given up on your dreams and desires out of an unrealistic fear of judgment, ridicule, or a self-imposed limiting belief.
As a former oncology and hospice nurse and still active cancer support group facilitator, I can tell you from my own firsthand experience working with patients who have been put in touch with their own mortality, that regret is real…
Just like Bronnie Ware in her book, The Top Five Regrets of the Dying, I have found that most people wish they had found the courage to do more, to take more risks. The number one regret patients reported according to Ware was as follows:
“I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.”
As reported in her book, this was the most common regret of all. “When people realise that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it.”
Now in all fairness and for equal balance I must also acknowledge the second regret that came from almost every male patient she nursed:
“I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.”
I believe it’s also important to put this regret into context with what the men in particular expressed about working so hard. She said, “They deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of work existence.”
It is this idea of the “treadmill of work existence” or as my friend Michael refers to, “the hamster wheel of life” that I want to explore further in this article, but before we move on, I think it’s important to capture one more element from The Top Five Regrets of the Dying.
The fifth regret simply stated: “I wish that I had let myself be happier.”
Ware writes, “Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called comfort of familiarity overflowed into their emotions as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content, when deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.”
This leads to the bigger question I hope to have each of you considering after reading this. What are your greatest regrets so far? What would you like to achieve or change before you die?
What QUEST remains awaiting the one key element required for its attainment?
Yes, it’s of YOU I speak…
Are you one of those who has only honored at most, half of your dreams? Do you even remember when it was you gave up? Do you remember why? Have you deluded yourself into believing it’s too late? Are you ready for the truth?
As long as you have breath in your body, a mind clear enough to remember, and the health to get up and out of the bed in the morning, it’s not too late!
Begin your quest now, tomorrow morning at the latest, I’ll give you the night to think it over. If you’ve taken in the words, I’ve shared here, then you might for the very first time be realizing that we have a limited number of days on this spinning rock.
And I’ll acknowledge that yes it might be risky to begin the pursuit of a dream late in life, but I’ve got a little secret to share with all of you. Here’s how risky life is. It’s so risky that NONE of us are getting out alive so why not go for it! What are you waiting for?
I know what you’re thinking… You don’t know where to start, right? Refer back to the opening quote that inspired this article and I think you’ll find all the inspiration you need to begin your quest.
If that doesn’t do it for you then perhaps this one will:
“I prefer the gradual path. My feeling is that mythic forms reveal themselves gradually in the course of your life if you know what they are and how to pay attention to their emergence. My own initiation into the mythic depths of the unconscious has been through the mind, through the books that surround me in this library. I have recognized in my quest all the stages of the hero’s journey. I had my calls to adventure, my guides, demons, and illuminations.” ~Joseph Campbell
Remember…
“The cave you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek.” ~Joseph Campbell
Stay tuned for the next article where I will go into greater detail around what I’ve recently discovered as it relates to the power of choosing or creating a quest to inspire permanent and lasting change in your life. As a matter of fact, I have worked out a process for you to follow if you choose. I have created a pathway or a gateway to your next big adventure and the only missing element is “YOU!”
Are you up for the challenge? Will you accept the mission? Are you QUEST ready?
Stay tuned…
Advance Confidently is the title of my next book, you will have to wait to celebrate its release as I celebrate my 60th birthday. I have concluded the world doesn’t need another self-help book from me right now, so I am listening to my muse and will write a sci fi personal growth story of self-discovery instead. Hmmm? Almost sounds like a quest, right? I believe you will be INSPIRED with the story that chose me to write it! I never saw it coming but now that it’s here, I can’t wait to share it with all of YOU! I know it will be worth the wait because that’s my commitment to you, my readers. Thanks in advance for your trust and patience!
In the meantime, I released a special audio short story on Twitter to commemorate my Independence Day and my 31st year of sobriety. You can watch/listen to the story here ( https://youtu.be/9zP4kk5OTlo ). You can find me on Twitter @bobby_kountz
Keep Pedaling, Keep Going, Keep Growing!
Advance Confidently!
If you enjoyed and found value in this article, please share it.
In Gratitude,
Bobby Kountz, Author, Speaker, Sobriety Scholar, Inspirationalist!
PS. You can find out more about me here. You can find my book on Amazon.
